Sunday, October 24, 2010

Want A Happy Marriage - Search For The Glue That Will Hold You Together

If you want a happy marriage, search for the glue that will bind you together. That is advice given through the generations and like a lot of comments from older people, it is worth listening to.

Every relationship is different, as unique as the two people involved in it. Your mutual attraction, shared memories and lifestyle will help to keep you together and prevent you becoming yet another statistic. But you cannot afford to just sit back and assume that you will always be happy. Happy marriages take work. Couples need to realize that they must spend time on their relationship as well as time apart in order to stand the best chance of staying together.

People often make the mistake of putting their kids first all the time. While your children are important, the relationship between you their parents is equally so. What better example can you set your children than to have them growing up in a home where everyone is valued and their contribution to family life is appreciated. You want your kids to grow up knowing how to treat other people properly. They learn from example so be sure that the example you are giving them is the one you want them to follow.

In a happy relationship both parties know that the other person will always be there for them. This doesn't mean that they will always take their side in an argument but that they will not be abusive or disparaging or disrespectful. You need to develop good listening skills - God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason. You need to learn to really listen to your partner and try to appreciate what they are saying to you. Poor communication does not result in you celebrating forty or fifty years of married bliss.

Spend time together - this seems like an obvious one but if you look back over the last month how much time have you two actually spent alone together. Staring at the TV screen every evening doesn't count. If you have to put a time in the diary but make sure that you spend at least one evening every two weeks together enjoying quality time.

If your intimate relationship needs some work, don't ignore it. Mutual attraction and lust played a huge part in you getting together in the first place. It is completely natural for the overwhelming urge to jump on each other to wear off but you should still find each other attractive. The good news is that the more you make love, the more your body will want it. Making love releases feel good chemicals and thus your body craves these good feelings. Even if you have to make a huge effort to get into the mood try and soon you may just find that it doesn't take that much effort anymore!

Finding the right partner to spend the rest of your life with is difficult but it is easy compared to keeping your marriage on the right track. Don't put your head in the sand. Read books like the Magic of Making Up and apply some of their teachings. You want a happy marriage? Search and apply the techniques that work for other people and you can be as happy as you wish.

1 comment:

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